


To you, I write this letter

by AXL_Reality



Category: Persona 5
Genre: Angst, Letters, M/M, a bit?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 05:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25678339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AXL_Reality/pseuds/AXL_Reality
Summary: To you who left that day.To you who felt like there's nothing left for you to live for.To you who weren’t able to listen to what I had to say.I write this letter.
Relationships: Akechi Goro/Persona 5 Protagonist
Kudos: 12





	To you, I write this letter

**Author's Note:**

> Did some P5 the Animation rewatch and my heart still aches for Akechi. This is just me crying for my ship 😭😭😭
> 
> Pardon all the inaccuracies in some canon facts. I'm too broke to buy the game, gonna watch some walkthroughs instead to make a more proper fic

> Hey, don't you think this is kind of old fashioned for the world that revolves around technology? Me writing you a letter using this scrap paper I found lying around my apartment and a random pen I picked up on the station platform during the morning train? I would like to drop all the formalities to be honest yet when I thought of you today - all those chess games we shared at Le Blanc, those small-time adventures we did inside mementos to earn money and those private sessions we held in my attic room, my supposedly stolen heart ached with the urge to pour these suppressed feelings out.
> 
> _To Akechi Goro who left that day, has he met his Mom?_
> 
> For sure you'd be contemplating as to why you're with her right now, right? You'd be thinking that you don't deserve to see her with all you did. However, I would like you to know that it's the adults who pushed you into doing those things. You were unjustly made into a pawn by God and gave you fate that would only lead to demise. Therefore it is justified for you to be with her now.
> 
> _To Akechi who felt like there's nothing left for him to live for, if given a chance, I would like to offer myself as a reason for him to continue living._
> 
> As much as you wanted to rationalize your nonexistence, I would have to deny this. Even if Shido refuse to accept you, I will. The entirety of the Phantom Thieves will even accept you as our friend. We would validate, appreciate and will even go against the adults for you.
> 
> _To Goro who wasn't able to listen to what I had to say, I want to seriously express my rage._
> 
> I was never angry at you though, but I am to myself. We had almost countless of chances - for me to express how strongly I felt for you and for you to properly give me an answer. Yet, I decided to just enjoy your small compliments for the brewed coffee I served, to affectionately watch how your mask sometimes falter when you thought I am winning against you in our games and to observe how you shiver and offer a timid smile whenever I whisper right into your ear in some moments I catch you lowering your guard.
> 
> You must've expected me to be the same smug leader, grinning at the fact that we would never be able to meet again yet, I feel like I can no longer smile as I'm stuck with longing for those fleeting moments instead.
> 
> I'm so uncool, aren't I? Please let me off-hook this once, Goro. Please let me indulge in the illusion of receiving a reply to my letter, and mourn for you, and soon accept reality.
> 
> Hey, even if you won't be able to hear this, let me say this to you whom I offered not just the queen piece from our chess set but also my heart, I love you. And I will until we meet on the other side.

Neatly folding the paper into even parts then sliding them inside a regular sized envelope, he looks at the shelf above his study table. There, the Queen chess piece lies along with the memoirs he earned from that time he spent in Tokyo, a year passed but the memories remain vivid.

Now that he wrote everything down, the sight of the piece carved in wood and painted black makes him smile instead of putting a lump on his throat. By then he acknowledges that Goro's memory no longer hurts him.

Just when he's done writing Goro's address on the envelope, his phone vibrates. He taps the e-mail open, a bit surprised to receive it from the guy who's supposed to be long gone. He needs a few minutes to read it, but the rest of his lifetime to get over it. "For sure, I'll be inviting you to the jazz club everyday," he whispers, wiping a tear off his jet black eyes before going back to his letter to seal it.

The former Detective is with his Mother now but after everything he has to do here is done, he'll get the chance to meet him face to face. Will Goro like it when he smugly grins when he confesses though?

* * *

> Like how great crimes end, I confession must be done thus I am typing this short e-mail to you, Joker.
> 
> The conclusion of this game has been long predetermined. I, as the antagonist will lose to you, the protagonist. There is no resentment on my part. That is a lie though as I have tons and tons of them, heavy enough to make me fall into hell after everything has been said and done.
> 
> _To you who I first met at Le Blanc, I find you interesting._
> 
> One time I visit cafe, you humored me for a chess game. At first you seem clueless. You look like there are lots of things going inside your head though your face doesn't even let me peek past those raven eyes. There's something more to you that makes me want to unravel and explore your thoughts even though I'm a sham detective. For the first time, someone made my heart beat wildly with curiosity.
> 
> _To you who have everything I would want to live for, I deem you as a subject of hate._
> 
> As I continue to interact with you, I realized how fortunate you are and how unlucky I am. How can you attain something I cannot even reach no matter how long I extend my grasp? Comrades and friends, acknowledgement and affection - you all have that. Even if staying with you is just a facade, it's so hard to breathe - feeling that you seem to seek me out even though you already have so many. What will you achieve if you acquired me? 
> 
> _To you who seem like have tons of things to say, I have one question - how can someone as confident as you falter over something as trivial as this?_
> 
> You always look like you're gonna commit a crime when we're alone, daring enough to invite me into your private space but too shy to take things to the next level. You tend to creep up to me and whisper over my ear affectionately yet you back down when I turn to you and keep me from a safe distance. You look like you want to say something but whenever I give you the chance; you just keep your mouth shut instead.
> 
> As I cannot read your eyes, I am not really sure what your intentions are. What do you need from me? Do you only want add my heart to your collection? 
> 
> Whatever the answer may be, it gives me a false hope that you will give me the love I always wanted. I could feel your need but without declaration, it isn't enough for me to drop everything and stay with you.
> 
> If you crossed over the line before I pulled the trigger to seal my fate, what will you do? I have various conclusions as to what might happen to us but I won't be telling you any of these in this e-mail. It's all up to you to make your own, go piece together the facts and add some of your twist. As you are really beyond my comprehension though, I wonder what your deduction would be.

Aketchi Goro sighs at the blinking cursor marking the end of his confession. There is too much romance in it, too emotional that it is very unlikely of Goro. He then decides this horrible mess must be deleted immediately.

His finger hovers over the backspace button, hanging just above it but never making the effort to press it. Instead, he reaches for the mouse pad then selects the date when he'll send the email. He sets it on a year from today then hits the 'send' button. 

From his pocket, he reaches for the queen piece. Staring at it, he assumes he's also looking at that guy's raven eyes. Tomorrow, he'll meet him at his Father's palace. Tomorrow will be his end as well.

This is a self-indulgent thought he but if he did confess to Goro, for sure his smug grin would turn into a blissful smile at the Detective's answer.


End file.
